A Reddit user suspected her boyfriend might be a bot due to his flawlessly structured messages — no typos, no grammatical slip-ups, just eerily perfect responses on a dating app. She only felt reassured of his humanity after speaking with him on the phone and meeting in person. “Over time, his texts became more natural, with slang and typos making conversations feel genuine. But one evening, when I sought comfort, his response felt robotic — neutral, polished, and detached. I’m 99% sure he used AI. It was the ‘perfect’ response,” she shares.
In the age of AI, relationships are undergoing an unexpected transformation. “I definitely think it’s a modern way to communicate more effectively,” claims Amravati-based Surabhi B*, who has been using AI for the past six to seven months to refine her personal messages for her partner.
From asking AI to draft messages to toning down emotionally charged responses, couples these days are increasingly using AI to filter their communication before sending texts to each other. But is AI enhancing relationships or subtly becoming a third wheel?
WHY USERS RELY ON IT
‘Makes discussions on complex topics easier’
Mumbai-based Ashwini D says, “AI has helped me enhance my communication skills with my partner. For instance, I was discussing a complex topic, such as financial transparency, with my partner over chat, and AI suggested rephrasing my message to make it more understandable. This helped avoid confusion and led to a more productive conversation.”
Balancing emotions
For people who struggle with impulsive texting, AI offers a way to reflect before hitting send.
For Surabhi, AI has helped her to tone down the tone of her texts, which, in turn, benefits her relationship, as her partner now receives calmer, more measured messages. “I tend to type out everything that comes to mind without considering how the other person might interpret it. Since I started using AI, my thoughts are conveyed more clearly to my partner than before.”
Fewer texting errors
Many users believe AI helps them communicate more effectively, preventing unnecessary conflicts and misunderstandings. “I’ve also noticed that since I started using AI to refine my messages, I make fewer texting errors. I think I’m becoming more mindful while I type, and my messages are now clearer than before,” adds Surabhi.
WHY USERS SHOULDN’T DEPEND ON IT
‘Relationships are about learning how to figure things out together’
Experts warn against over-reliance on AI. Clinical psychologist Dr Arti Shroff explains, “The real danger is dependence. If AI is always solving your relationship dilemmas, you’re skipping the development of key skills—problem-solving, communication, and emotional navigation. Relationships aren’t just about finding answers; they’re about learning how to navigate challenges together. Relying too much on AI means you risk losing that ability altogether.”
May differ from authentic feeling
Another 33-year-old female Reddit user, who used AI to help articulate her thoughts and express care towards her husband, shares, “I tested it out, and it crafted a response that included everything I wanted to say, but it came across as kinder and more caring than I would have originally expressed it. I never sent it to my husband because it didn’t feel authentic.”
‘AI can misinterpret too’
While it may help you as the first person, does it truly read the other person’s mind? “It helps in understanding tone and sentiment, but it’s not always accurate. Once, an AI misinterpreted my partner’s sarcasm, leading to a brief misunderstanding. I use AI interpretation as a guide rather than a definitive answer,” explains Ashwini.
HOW TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY BALANCE
The key is to let AI support human connections, not replace them. Experts suggest using AI only when it truly helps express thoughts better.
“If someone uses AI tools to refine their grammar while expressing their emotions, that is perfectly acceptable—as long as the content remains their own. However, one should not say something they do not genuinely feel just because ChatGPT or Google suggests it. The emotions must come from within,” says Aanchal Gupta Kalantri, a relationship coach.
Advice for couples
– Use AI to refine your messages without altering the core sentiment
– Don’t use it for expressing deep emotions
– Do not rely on AI to generate emotions you do not truly feel
– Relationship conflicts should be addressed with honest dialogue, not AI-generated responses
While texting, messages can sometimes be misinterpreted; in such cases, AI can be useful. Whenever my partner and I disagree, I ensure that I run my message through AI before sending it. This helps me confirm that my words have retained their intended meaning while also making the tone more composed
Surabhi B, AI enthusiast
Using AI tools for texting is not necessarily a sign of low confidence or emotional insecurity. Not everyone is proficient in grammar or in expressing their emotions clearly. It demonstrates a willingness to put effort into improving one’s relationship
Aanchal Gupta Kalantri, a relationship coach
AI is an easy shortcut. People are already turning to it for relationship advice — copying texts from their partners, running them through AI for analysis, and letting it craft the ‘perfect’ response. It’s like outsourcing emotional labour to a bot! This trend is only going to grow
Dr Arti Shroff, a clinical psychologist
