A Play About Relationships Gone Wrong And Finding The Courage To Flee

“Love is an untamed force,” writes Paulo Coelho. “When we try to control it, it destroys us. When we try to imprison it, it enslaves us. When we try to understand it, it leaves us feeling lost and confused.”

Even when devastating, love can still be funny. A this-is-too-surreal-to-be-real kind of funny. In her new play, My First Ex Husband, Joy Behar delves into the rocky waters of relationships, love, sex and what leads people to get divorced.

After spending hours interviewing an eclectic group of women over the course of twelve years, she found both humor and heart in their true stories. They share devastating, inspiring, poignant and funny reflections about the struggle to leave their marriages and give up what up they know. Even if their relationships are toxic, to begin anew is scary.

The play features candid tales of infidelity, like the husband seeking his wife’s blessing to have sex on the side. One recounted her survivalist ex’s extreme frugality like using Entenmann’s pie plates for hub caps or bringing cats into the house to heat up the place. Then there was the guy with an unrelenting and insatiable appetite for sex that could never be satisfied.

Behar shaped the stories into monologues that are performed by a rotating cast, which currently includes Veanne Cox, Carolyn McCormick, Andrea Navedo and Jackie Hoffman. Directed by Randal Myler, the 80-minute production is playing Off Broadway at MMAC Theater. The actors read the monologues from a podium.

For Emmy-nominated Hoffman, whose credits include Only Murders in the Building, Feud: Betty and Joan and a slew of Broadway and Off-Broadway shows like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, On The Town, The Addams Family, Xanadu, Hairspray, and Fiddler on the Roof in Yiddish, performing in the show is a true joy. And, she says, “The joy is Joy Behar.”

Plus after being in the show makes her value her husband even more. “I’ve always appreciated my husband,” says Hoffman. “But hearing these monologues put that appreciation into overdrive and made me appreciate him even more.”

Jeryl Brunner: What went through your mind when you got word about your being in My First Ex-Husband?

Jackie Hoffman: It seemed like a cool clique to be a part of. I’m among great actresses and comedians. And it seemed like an easy gig. I was wrong about that.

Brunner: It is said that truth is stranger than fiction. And what surreal experiences these women have experienced. What do you wish you could say to them?

Hoffman: One of the monologues that I do involves a woman who “escaped” an oppressive culture. I’d congratulate her and tell her I admire her courage. In general, I’d congratulate all of these women for moving on

Brunner: How would you describe My First Ex Husband?

Hoffman: [The play contains] stories of marriage and divorce that will exhaust your emotions. With a lot of laughs.

Brunner: You play so many great roles on television, film and in animated series. And there’s all your incredible theater work. What keeps you coming back to the stage?

Hoffman: The audiences keep me alive and on my toes. Particularly with this show. It’s an active relationship with the audience and each audience is different. I can’t phone it in. Since telling these stories, I’ve become more passionate about the women I’m portraying. They have their own kind of fire.